Every time I see or hear Eliot Spitzer on television I throw up a little in my mouth. How can anyone take this golum seriously? And now this buffoon has a CNN show called Parker Spitzer--every night. What has this world come to? Every time I see his wretched face, my mind races to that horrific image of the Spitz doing the nasty with Ashley Dupre all the while wearing his polyester stinky black socks. I need a shower just thinking about that--a shower in bleach. If someone could please just put a paper bag over his head then maybe I could stomach the dialogue; just a thought. 

The same is true for Brett Favre. Every time I see his furry, scruffy mug on the screen I have horrific flashbacks to the text pics of his little weenie that he sent, ever so proudly, to Jenn Sterger. First of all Brett, you're an idiot. There's nothing there to be photographing. Second, and more importantly, I wish someone would have told you to just take a look at your wife. She's smokin' hot and has stuck by you through all your addictions and Lord only knows what other demons. She's further suffered breast cancer. I think she's been through enough. Now you have to subject her to this crap. You're a grandfather, for crying out loud. Stick your little magic stick back into your pants and keep him there. Oh, and by the way, did you notice that Jenn looks just like your wife? Maybe you should have saved all of us the brain space and time wasted debating your fidelity and just texted those pictures to  your wife. You know, wives like to get those photos too.

While I'm on a roll here, what in the world was Virginia Thomas thinking when she called Anita Hill on a Saturday morning at 7:30am requesting an apology from her for what she did to her husband, the now Supreme Court Justice, Clarence Thomas. Really, Virginia? It's been 20 years since this entire charade happened--hasn't the statute of limitations on this event and our memory of it lapsed? It would be like Hilary Clinton calling Monica Lewinsky for an apology because she allowed Bill to fondle her with a cigar and permanently stain her navy blue dress. I'd like to believe that Virginia made the call because she wanted to attract some attention to herself. To be sure, we're learning about her political work and other platforms so in that regard, she's furthered the notion that even bad press is still press. What's further ironic about this entire charade is that Anita Hill kept the phone message and then called the FBI. She called the FBI!! I mean really, what did that call go like: "Hi. Um. Yeah. I got an unsolicited call asking me for an apology. Yes. That's it. That's all she said. She wanted an apology." Get in line Anita. How many of us get unsolicited calls multiple times a day--the sane people don't call the freakin' FBI about it, though!  

Last but not least, didn't Juan Williams know that proclaiming his fear of flying with Muslims would get him into trouble? The cynical part of me thinks that he was just looking for a way out of the NPR web, wanted to cross over into the FOX NEWS realm and what better way to do it! He orchestrated this slip up beautifully and all the while garnered himself much attention and publicity for his new show on FOX who swaddled him right up with a $2 million contract.  The innocent and naive part of me thinks that he was just human and probably said what he was thinking without considering its effect on the masses. Regardless, his comments got people's panties in bunches and served up some heated discussions.