Ages ago I used to be the proud owner of a sassy shirt that bore the text: "Here comes trouble." My mother, its purchaser, resolutely thought no truer words were ever spoken. I miss that shirt for many reasons, the most obvious being that it was so accurate. And yes, this is an admission that my mother was right. Eeesh. Painful to say, I know.

At any rate, my kind of trouble is the kind that can really piss people off. I challenge people's positions; I test their patience by questioning their reasoning. I speak when many would like me to shut up and I stand when most would like me to cower in the corner. I'm no wallflower or shrinking violet.  Some might say that I have "tiger blood" or "Adonis DNA."  I come with only two modes: "off" and "on." Maybe it's because of these attributes, that I have many friends but a lot more enemies. I'm sure the same is true with Charlie Sheen.

But, you know, as much as I'd like to understand Charlie Sheen, as much as I struggle to make sense of the garbage that spews from his mouth, I really can't find any logical semblance to it. In fact, I'm just horrified by it. He's gotten the entire country absolutely hypnotized by his antics, but at what cost? I, for one, don't know whether to laugh or cry or start saying my Hail Mary's whenever I see his increasingly emaciated, tattered face. This is not a sane, healthy man. This is not a publicity stunt. This man need serious mental and physical help and laughing at his charades and enabling his behavior will serve no higher purpose.  

I wonder if we all stopped being so horrifically transfixed by Charlie, if we just tuned him out and stopped granting him radio air and television face time, if he would actually appreciate his problems and face reality? Can Charlie just snap out of whatever he's gotten himself into and get better on his own? Sadly, I doubt it; I think he may have taken that deep-end plunge.

Some people are seemingly like that, though. They live in their own little metaphysical worlds, carrying on with or without an audience, and living their lives without feeling the need to come down to this earth that the rest of us have to live on.  These people scare the crap out of me. Take for example the manager/owner of Mirror Mirror Salon on Dearborn, "Staci," the nightmare salon that almost caused this natural redhead to be robbed of her gingery locks. I've blogged about my horrendous experience on here before, for now, two things are clear: 1) the salon couldn't figure out how to open a bottle of shampoo let alone cut and color hair and 2) this "Staci" is a nut job. More than three months after our paths crossed for the last time, she just can't let it go. She's harassed me quite a few times in the past but this last time was the real kicker. Clearly, she's still ruminating and seething over the "trouble" I apparently caused her because here's the (entire, unedited) email she penned me on Yelp in response to my review--possibly while being on a Charlie Sheenesque bender:

staci k. has sent you a message on Yelp:

Karmic debt or maybe Gods will

Just for your information I am very religious and I have found that blasphemy  does not pay off. As a matter of fact the negative consequences are torturous. Go run with your words and tell the world. I know I did my part and offered to help you. In the past Pamela I used to be like you, jumping the gun, no patience. over sensitve, not willing to forgive. That is why I have your review representing my salon. Karmic debt or God showing me the way to the right . Beyond that I have suffered with my overly handsome and successful husband him not understanding my harshness similar to yours. I found another route. PATIENCE. FORGIVENESS . I am not telling you what to do but I will guarantee you one thing. Your words will haunt you both with your husband and with any future children or important ties with humans. Stephanie is probably the most religious  and righteous human being you will ever get to meet. She volunteers to elderly, she has a son to care for and is intentional in her membership to church. For you to slam her after she tried so hard and for you to slam me after trying to keep your husband entertained out of kindness not lust and to offer help to you is just going to bring you to your knees one day. I am not threatening you with bodily harm I am simply tuning you in with out of this world beyond your control God's way or Shivas way or buddhas powers way. We ask once again that you recant your review. This is the last time we contact you.  Undo your words and suffer less with repayment according to karma
Staci
Mirror Mirror

After I read this harangue, for probably the first time in my life, I had no words. Ok, that's a lie. I had and have some colorful words: 1) again, I repeat: what a nut job; 2) I should probably look into getting a restraining order; and 3) my husband should be weary of lustful women named "Staci."

In the end, I may have thought I was trouble, but then again, I think some people cause more trouble than others!